Been playing so much World of Warcraft again that I have forgotten about the blog… sorry! I will be up and at it again from now on – hopefully~. Going to post a bunch of screenshots from World of Warcraft and also show my cute pocketgirlfriends new outfits. Oh my, I might have become a tad bit obnoxious, but right now, I do not care. So much serious stuff going on in real life anyway that you got to make some silly or weird blogposts.
Silly… but cute~!
Been on-going drama between friendgroups, the guild, family and real life events/appointments. So excuse me for a lackluster blogpost, but that is what I can and have the will to give out right now.
I am back, I have no idea why I stopped writing, or well I do. I guess this is what this blogpost will be about… and some new images of how we moved around furniture in our house. Can’t end it on a bad note! Or a sad note.
Well, for a couple of months now I have been not feeling quite… tiptop. It feels more or less like a depression, but the symptoms are completely different. I can feel it undermining every thought I have but it does not take over, like usual. I laugh, I feel happy, I feel sad, I feel anger but… not lasting. Because at the end the state of my mind is unstable enough to be apathetic. But not a full-time apathy, which confuses me. Is this a depression or is this something else? I have heavy experience with depressions and it feels like one, but it does not appear like one.
It is weird, but at the same time pretty nice. It dulls my anxiety, and I thank it for that. My anxiety was getting worse to the point where I felt it everyday and for small mundane tasks such as getting people over, talking to people over the internet… my biggest new anxiety that surfaced was to appear vulnerable infront of people. I guess it took such a toll on my body that it ended with it shutting down, to this state. I don’t like it but at the same time I do. Michelle joked about that this might be the rest of my life, free from anxiety. But I do not want this thing eating at me whenever I do not occupy myself with something different all the time…
Meh, either way I will be very honest to the person coming to “help” (still very skeptical about her ability to do so, but it is an alternative to nothing. I ended up not going to the people that specialize in anxiety disorders and they said they would call to make a new appointment, but that was years ago) me on the first September, and tell her that this is how it is now and what is she going to do to try and help me.
On another note, we remodelled the house a bit. We moved the bed downstairs, the bookcases out to the dining corner and moved the table to a different wall. It all looks so fancy and nice now!
Been out all day almost to eat dinner and celebrate my belate birthday with Mich’s mother and her husband, and their two doggies. We went away around 15.30 and came home around 20.30, and now we are playing Diablo 3 together with Faye, Ashe and Crool. Sadly you can only be four in a group.
Did make up for Michelle today, it might have been because my hands were sweaty or the room was very warm/humid so the foundation powdered up a bit, but blending it a bit more helped. I naaaaailed that fucking eye liner though, looks good on both eyes. I get better and better at make up, which makes me able to use more techniques on Michelle which makes her in turn happy which makes me happy!
I am so tired after interacting with so many people today, so I am just a bit silent and just listening to people talking, it is quite soothing.
We drank wine, both white and red, very good quality and taste. We ate also a vegetarian dish, with a lot of vegetables!
Mich was very cute today, her jeans were right on point, couldn’t stop touching or sneaking glances at her little behind.