Well, hello.

I am back, after a turmoiled filled month away from the blog, I am again back at it. I am in a much better place now than I was before. Events have gone past with a lot of hello’s, goodbye’s and neutral standpoints. Oh, what’s that? Pointform?! Yes.

  • Me and Michelle are still living together, preparing to move back to Sweden during summer. She will probably travel with me, then go on a vacation to meet some friends in Sweden. Will probably be pretty fun, just need to invest in an ID – got a lot of information of it, just need to book a time at the Swedish embassy.
  • Life is a bit easier now, at least regarding living together. Much less annoyance and passive aggressivity. There are sometimes where feelings flare up again, but it is very fleeting and not meant to be acted upon. Don’t really see a reason why to initiate anything, the only reason they flare up is because you stay close to each other and you have a history together. So you just have to take it with a pinch of salt.
  • I got a bed now, that is a big plus.
  • Me and Frederik is not really happening, it was a couple of horrible weeks where I woke up all the time crying and missing him intensely. We just did not seem to want to go in the same direction, I showed in major ways how serious I was about it and meh. Sometimes it goes through, sometimes it doesn’t. And this was obviously one of the latter situations.
  • But now it is a bit better, I don’t really “allow” myself to think of him, I surround myself with fun things instead. A lot of laughter and movement helps!
  • My sister is pregnant and getting married this summer! That’s amazing. I am going to be an aunt – again!
  • I got dropped from the therapyinstitution, but I think it is for the better. Instead of me taking up the time from someone else that they can help much more. I just am done with trying to find ways of “fixing” it. I firmly believe everyone lives with anxieties/depression, just that they live with it instead of focusing only on it.
  • So that is what I have started doing, living with it. I go outside, I exercise, I go to the store, I push my own boundaries more. Can’t be bothered trying to find a “miracle”-cure.

Well, that is about it. Pointform has been made. Might start updating more often, need to change my domain name too, ridiculous name is ridiculous.

Birthday celebrations

Well, sorry about yesterday I guess. I did not sleep for a whole night and I guess it amplified all the negative feelings I was carrying around, which resulted in a really big pity party post. Sorry, but not sorry, it is a personal blog after all!

Going to a friend today with Michelle, to celebrate his early birthday (he celebrates it officially tomorrow, but we are coming early). So gotta shower soon, help Michelle with her make up and then head out to the bus. Scary right? It is for Michelle, a little bit at least. But sometime you gotta go “full time” according to the transition therapy, sure she is not in the therapy now, but we can help the therapy a long way by already going full time. Michi’s mom will be bringing us home in the evening, buses stop going around six on the weekend, and staying only three hours on a Dutch birthday, nah, that is not appropiate. So she is going to pick us up and take us home afterwards.

So anyway, got to go and prepare ourselves, we still have some time to just chill around, but better be already done than rushing the procedures with showering, hair styling and make up!